


And the Ships Pick Up Speed...

by madmoriarty



Series: Once Upon a Sleepy Elementary [17]
Category: Elementary (TV), Once Upon a Time (TV), Sleepy Hollow (TV)
Genre: But what to do about them?, Captain Swan - Freeform, F/M, Grocery Shopping, Joanlock - Freeform, Katrina Crane - Freeform, The boys all have super huge crushes, ichabbie - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-20
Updated: 2015-03-20
Packaged: 2018-03-18 17:40:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 934
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3578190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madmoriarty/pseuds/madmoriarty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The boys get a little gossiping time of their own as they're sent to go pick up more food and supplies from the grocery store.</p>
            </blockquote>





	And the Ships Pick Up Speed...

“What is next on the list?” Ichabod asked, pushing the towering cart down the grocery store aisle. 

“Milk,” Killian answered, tracing his hook down the list of checked off items. The girls had sent the guys off to do errands while they were busy preparing a plan of attack. Six people in one tiny cabin went through provisions like there was no tomorrow. “Where is that?” 

An annoyed Sherlock grabbed the list from him and took charge. Ichabod and Killian followed him wordlessly. His ill-manners were not taken well, but the two acknowledged that without him they would be in the store for hours when they had more important matters back at the cabin. This was more practice for Ichabod, and Killian too. Sherlock was merely playing babysitter.

“So, how are things between you and the lass?” Killian asked slyly, looking for a good conversation starter to pass the time. Pirates were notorious for gossip.

“Katrina and I have not seen one another for centuries…” Ichabod answered in confusion. 

“No, not her,” Killian said, rolling his eyes. “Abbie!”

“Lieutenant Mills?” Ichabod knew where Killian was going with this, but he chose to play it cautiously. “I do not know what you are insinuating.”

“Come on, mate,” Killian kept pressing. “The two of you obviously share a mutual affection.” Ichabod immediately became very startled. 

“I have a wife!” Ichabod retorted, pretending insult. He wasn’t ready to talk about this in such a context. He needed to push the idea out of the pirate’s mind. 

“Yes, a dead wife,” Killian snorted. Ichabod was no fun, and as the modern folk would say, a “goody-two-shoes”. He didn’t need to parade the gentleman act around 24/7. 

Ichabod kept his mouth pressed firmly shut and walked ahead of the cart, leaving Killian to push it. Killian had taken it too far. 

“Oh come on! Have a bit of fun, Crane,” Killian lightened his tone to try to ease the situation. “We all know Sherlock is doing his partner.” Sherlock stopped in his tracks out of complete surprise. Killian smiled as he waited for Sherlock’s angered response. That was what Killian liked to call a hook with false bait, to refer to nautical terms. He hadn’t the slightest what was going on between Sherlock and Joan, but this was how he was going to find out.

“Miss Watson and I are not ‘doing’ anything,” Sherlock spat, turning on his heel and jabbing his finger into Killian’s chest. No matter how many times Sherlock poked him, Killian’s smile didn’t falter. “Your crass language is absolutely appalling. And even if I and Miss Watson were participating in coitus with one another, it would be none of your damn business.” Killian put his hands up in fake surrender, trying to stifle laughter at the positively steaming Sherlock. He had gotten everything he wanted. Even Ichabod was taken aback. 

Sherlock’s face flushed as he realized that his anger had revealed too much. He immediately calmed himself, and proceeded to try to explain. “Joan is the closest friend I have ever had. I don’t let other people in like I have her, and because of that our relationship can become…confusing.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself, mate,” Killian nodded. “I think she likes you too.” Sherlock’s face became even more flushed and he decided to say nothing more.

“Fine, dammit!” Ichabod threw his arms up. There was no point in hiding it now. “I do have affections for Abbie.” Sherlock and Killian looked at one another in surprise. “ _But_ I am still a married man and acting on those feelings would be a betrayal to my wife, ‘dead’ or not.” Ichabod hated the position he was in. His emotions were torn right down the middle. Sherlock and Killian’s downcast eyes seemed to say that they understood that he had it rough.

“And what of you and Miss Swan?” Sherlock looked to Killian after Ichabod finished his confession. “It’s your turn to spill, Jones.”

“I can’t make it any more obvious how enamored I am with Emma Swan,” Killian answered truthfully. “So what is your question?”

“Are the feelings mutual?” Ichabod asked. Killian had a hard time answering this. If Emma did have even a smidgen of similar feelings, she did an excellent job of hiding them. 

“I believe they are,” Sherlock said before Killian could give them a response, slightly shocking Killian. Sherlock knew that all of them sat in the unknown. These women were not just any women; they were strong, independent, glorious human beings who had each saved the world in their own way. They did not have to have superior intellect, or be born in a magical world, nor reawaken in another era to be intimidating. They were goddesses of their own design.

“How do you know?” Killian pressed, growing increasingly excited. 

“That is my profession,” Sherlock replied. When Killian continued to give him the wide-eyed hopeful stare, Sherlock sighed and gave him an example. “Every time she rolls her eyes at you she purposely looks away from you and bites the inside of her cheek. She is trying to feign a smile at your idiotic flirting.” Killian knew he had just been insulted, but he was too elated to make a come-back. 

“Is that the time already?” Ichabod startled the trio out of their lovey-dovey stupor. “We should really hurry back, the girls are probably waiting for us.” Ichabod pushed the cart down the aisle faster, until Sherlock stopped him and redirected him the opposite way to where the check-out lanes were. He still had a lot to learn.

**Author's Note:**

> Here you go, ya filthy animals [home alone reference don't h8]. I decided to pick up the pace on the whole ships thing. Don't get too excited though, the pace isn't that fast. I like the pre-dating emotions a lot so this will probably drag on quite a bit. Because this ace really likes her fluff.


End file.
